Category Archives: Awareness


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It is impossible as head-nodders for us to learn the true subject of our gossip.

But gossip we do, nod we do, smile and frown and clap we do like starlings at early dawn; we flap, we rustle, we cling together and rise from the grasses flying this way and that, seeking the leader whose randomness fails us.

At sundown the murmeration ceases and together we rustle, we rhyme with the rhythm of the restless till darkness overcomes. Tomorrow we rise again and like the murmeration of starlings we dismount from our roosts, our heads awaggle,

we’ll gossip and gaggle,

the bloated carcasses of our forgotten comrades adding nourishment to the earth and one or two will say “do you remember whatsisname?”.

Oh yes comes the answer, he had so many strange, new ideas.

And with heads abob we bestow our final, limited approval in measured doses and our world nods approval to the brief observance of continuity, forgetting yet another true leader.




We are all stupid people. We are born into a world of fear and we begin our search for safety. Learning to crawl makes us feel safe. Standing and walking…safer. The cheers from family make us feel safer still. But we are not safe – we are stupid.

The early approval from friends and family confuses us. We mistake approval for safety. As safety groups grow larger with classrooms, boardrooms and jobs we mistake approval for truth, love and happiness. But we are not safe – we are stupid.

We fall in love. (Why fall? Why not leap?) We raise a family. The children follow in our footsteps and eventually leave; the approval of our children was as important to us as was ours to them. We called it LOVE. How do we get it, we ask; we ask for LOVE in our prayers. But by asking for it we are ignoring the un-conditionality of LOVE and confusing it with APPROVAL. That’s stupid.

Perhaps we discover that since LOVE is unconditional, we need only to accept this gift. But we still feel unloved. “Psst, pass it on” someone whispers and we smile; we remember how we feel when we are hugged and encouraged and we decided to do just that. We become committed; we “accept the love and pass it on.” That’s not stupid.




How many times have you heard the words “Why do to think that?”. If you find yourself facing such a challenge again be prepared to  notice that an answer to that question is probably not spontaneous unless of course you are a fast – thinking lawyer.

I was the victim of a skilled interviewer once and embarrassed when I had no answer. It wasn’t as though I had prepared for such a question; I wasn’t a PhD candidate in the midst of an oral exam – I was being asked to defend one of life’s values, a rule by which I had lived my life, a core value the rightness of which one does not question.


I had no answer. And that was my answer. “I don’t know…” I replied. “I just don’t know.

And thus began a shift in the way I view life. I write about, I think about, I puzzle over and I seek answers to my own questions. And that is how I morphed from a life as a writer to that of a writer with purpose.


lafayette compound 008
Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened?
Everything with a nervous system seeks safety, primarily by clinging to others of its kind. In other words no matter what we have done on any given moment has been born of fear, self seeking and dishonesty.
Honesty is not a term that fits anything living. When the search for safety yields approval  from others of our ilk we tell ourselves that we are safe when in fact safety itself is not to be found but experienced. It is an attitude that prevails as a result of accepting God’s Love.